Welcome! Enjoy some of the finer pages of online ramblings out there! If you have found this page through BlogSpot, please visit my homepage using the links on the sidebar. Inspired by the certainty of my headaches, "The Headache Diaries" may include my headache log. I also like to log other things such as people, places, and things that I don't like, as well as people, places, and things that I do like.
:: Welcome to The Headache Diaries
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So its about a quarter to 6am and I am not particularly sleepy. Given that I now normally wake up at about 1pm, I wonder if this will have any adverse effects . From what I learned from my sleep class, no it won't, unless I get some job that starts at 8am (for the love of God WHY would I do that???) and I am now falling alseep at the wheel. Hm. Sounds like my last year at City.. Falling alseep on the Belt by the VZ Bridge and swerving to avoid disaster with the guardrail all during evening rush hour traffic. And the car I used to drive was LOUD. Yet that was not enough to keep me up. HA!.. to make matters worse, I'd be on my way to my HEAVY DRIVING JOB. Obviously nothing has happened, but that was only due to large amount of coffee and sugar products (i.e., donuts and horribly processed "bakery" items from the vending machine). To be honest I do not remember much.
But I do know that I have Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome! Oh yes indeed I do. The book for the course I took for sleep disorders says that "a person with DSPS may not start to feel sleepy until 1 or 2am.... In severe case [(me?)], somone suffering from DSPS may not become sleepy until its almost dawn." Or in my case, past dawn and the birds are singing and the school busses are revving. The only thing is that "suffering" is subjective. Now that I don't HAVE to get up at 6am (or 4:30am as I used to!!) I am not suffering. Furthermore, Ive been sleep deprived for years. And unlike the supposed vast population of DSPS "sufferers" who miss work and are always late and fail class, I was late maybe to the horrible music class in high school (but reformed since that point) and have never been late to class unless it was because the bus broke down or something I could not control. I also have never failed anything because I was sleeping. In. Ive failed tests, but thats because I was stupid. Or didn't study. Or didn't care.
Well, anyway, I will attempt sleep soon, but I will get up early this weekend so I can be a little sleepy come Sunday night. And what perplexes me is that I don't even finish the cup (size = 12oz) of coffee I make almost everyday. This is a 100% natural, non-induced by stress or other crap, syndrome. I assume I will have to try to adjust my wake up time to 11 or so I can start studying for my GMAT test. I cant wake up at 1 and start studying. That's just weird, even if I would have 5 hours before work. wait a minute... hmm...
All this wakeful time and I havent updated shit on my webpage. Well, its a big effort, I was looking at all the obsolete pages and thought that I need to do some major restructuring. I think my site will look a little smaller. There is so much unorganized crap in my file manager Im not sure I want to undertake such an idea. It took me a week just to clean out my hard drive. That was easy. My site actually has to look good and make sense. Too much thinking involved.
So now its 6:20 and Im not much sleepier. Maybe I should ride my bike during the wee hours of the morn and be more productive than just sitting here figuring out the calories to lentil soup.
But I do think about other things, like future job plans and school. I was thinking about that safety assistant position I did not put in for. I wonder if I would have got it. I did need DG training. And my portfolio doesn't even exist. Well, in any case, I do think about how I will get to B-School, if I do at all. I search all night for alternatives and the only other interesting thing that I can do is I/O Psychology (Industrial/Occupational Psychology) or something in Logistics or the supply chain realm. Its daunting! Im still wondering that, say I do well on the GMAT, like above average, should I still put off applying so I can get an admin job to spiffy up my background or should I try to get in right away. There are too many choices. Not to mention trying to build the framework rightnow and not get off track. Blehh!!!
6:30... I better get to bed. I can whine about all this after 1pm
:: Jane Dee 2:50:00 AM [+] ::
I usually wake up to 1010 Wins and listen in on the latest news and I heard the spot for the event and I woke up. I was like "har? Bull riders? OOooh!" So I tried to get some preferred seating through American Express Gold Card Events, but I found there were still some cheap seats left so I bought those instead (but the preferred seats had a great view). In any case, I am very excited and can't wait to go. Ive always wanted to go see a bull riding show somewhere, but this is much more convenient than hoping to cross paths with a show one day whilst traveling.
It's in January, but it gives me something to look forward to.
oops time for work
:: Jane Dee 2:49:00 PM [+] ::
:: 6.20.2006 ::
Almost Time For Work
And I just ate rice and beans! har har!
I have a few things I'd like to post, first of is I cannot spell the word fiesty (see there I go again, spelling it like fiesta) so I use the guidance of Merriam-Webster and find out they are having a "party like it's 1806" bonanza to celebrate the 200th anniversary of M-W dictionary. Of course, I will not be signing up for the spelling bee, but I am tempted to visit the event on July 27 in Massachussettes (did I spell that right?) or the one in Brockport, NY.
Second news event that is placed in the "dumb" category is of course school related. I paid $30 for "event" pictures taken by a photography company whose name I will not disclose until I don't get my reorder. This company was hired by CCNY to take pictures of our HONORS CONVOCATION (remember that). When I paid the large sum (for three 5x7 pictures), the bottom of each picture said "Graduation Ceremony" NOT HONORS CONVOCATION....?? So of course I called them and said "Yes, hi, this was honors convocation not graduation" and they said that they would reissue my pictures with the correct titles in a couple of weeks. So if they don't, I will gladly dispute the charge thru my credit card and generously curse them out. I have a feeling all be be amended though. Maybe I am just optimistic.
Third thing is that I am becoming quite lazy now without much responsibilities. I am supposed to be saving money and studying and looking for leadership positions but Ive been so Pfft. Though I have been working on my webpage, and I have finished my graduation video (no, Ive not posted it yet). I have also come up with a new logo for my webpage and I plan to do a lot of reconfiguring. I have also finished looking through my pictures and have cleaned up my C drive on my computer. It took four years to finally fill it up. Well, thats nice, I also have a 16GB hard drive to fill and Ive cleaned out about 4GB on the C drive. I guess I have another four years to fill up both drives.
Now its time i get dressed for work. I hope I do not get another migraine like I did yesterday (OWWWW)! Today should be a short day, hopefully, and I want to come back home and start rearranging my webpage.
:: Jane Dee 3:07:00 PM [+] ::
:: 6.15.2006 ::
Lucky for me, my memories of school are practically gone! My brain is happily compressing all that useless information whilst I sleep, which by the way, is make up sleep for all the years Ive been in school. What joy!
In other news, I have not forgot about my webpage. I am trying my darndest to sort thru all these pictures - and take them off my crowded hard drive after all this time - and get them posted and make some changes to my current webpage. I am also in the process of making my graduation video, which is coming along nicely in my brain, but not as nicley on the computer. Not that it's coming out bad, Ive just not been able to upload the video until now and when that is done I can load the music and get editing.
I also bought new Gucci sunglasses among other things. I keep telling myself "stop consuming!!" but it's difficult when you have a tremendous weight lifted off you (school) and want to celebrate. Though I really should stop spending so much because I need to save up for my upcoming vacations. No, I don't need to save money to go there, I need to save money to spend there. I also want to take advantage of my airline employment status and use my employee discounts to go and visit some schools before I commit myself to some online description of how wonderful some school is only to find out its in a boring city without much going on (e.g., New Haven, ahem). There are a lot (too many) MBA programs out there and what makes one better than another to me is usually determined by the atmosphere and the surroundings. Like with Yale, I didn't see how the rest of the package would justify paying all that money. It's one thing for a school to be great, its another for it to be in a great place. If I wanted shitty location, I can just go to Baruch.
:: Jane Dee 12:28:00 AM [+] ::
:: 6.07.2006 ::
Late Night Nostalgia
Not in a good way though. I was just thinking about LIU and all the stupidity there. Come to think of it, it was far worse than City. At least the people at City arent assholes. Thats a plus. I was remembering this one asshole professor I had for history. Ugh.
Typically, when something long and enduring finally ends, I run through memories then put them in the long storage part of my brain where I don't really have ready access to them unless Im trying to remember them. So for a few days after the culmination, I may get sad or happy then sad again. Then, it all goes away and I can hardly remember anything. That's a good thing because I don't think I want to remember smelly train rides and migraine headaches.
Oh yeah wasn't the world supposed to end yesterday?
Well, in any case, I am pretty happy that everything is over, yet sad that it wasn't more memorable. Right now I feel lazy. I have a million things to get started and all I do is sleep. Given that I calculated I lost about 120 hours of sleep last summer semester alone, I can say that for all the years Ive been in acedemia and studying my ass off to get As, I am sure I need more than 1,000 hours of sleep catch up time. According to some of my rough calculations, I need about one more month of long sleep (8-9 hours) to fully recover from all this. In the meantime, I have to make a list of stuff I need to do... like the webpage, my CDL-A, GMAT studies, bike riding (ha!) etc.
hm, I guess I should go and make up some sleep now.
:: Jane Dee 12:58:00 AM [+] ::
:: 6.06.2006 ::
I am at school and lucky for me my diploma was FINALLY READY!! I have it right here next to me. This will be my last entry from school for a long time.
As I thought, the honors certificate says Magna Cum Laude, but my diploma says Cum Laude. I could have waited for the dude who does the certificates to fix it but you know what, I will keep it that way to forever preserve the stupidity of my school. I really should be Magna, but honors is honors and I guess I can't argue my way through everything. Sometimes, the administration wins by a good 'ol wearing you down.
As for the certificate, it could be nicer. It looks cheap, but at least its not a computer print out. I think the frame I bought for it was way too expenisve but well, what's done is done. Im not about to go and return it... or am I?
Well, I best be going. My meter will run out and I want to get home and FINALLY put my diploma in its frame and hang it up.
NOW I can rest.
Praise the Lord! Amen.
:: Jane Dee 12:09:00 PM [+] ::
So like I said I was going to do, I am sorting and editing years worth of pictures that I had meant to upload to my webpage. There are pictures that I blogged about and never uploaded! For example:
I had wrote about some weird dreams I was having about snakes and fog and swamps and my eye shooting out blue liquid like a squid or somthing (ewWWW!) over TWO YEARS AGO. (see here) But obviously I was not well at that point in time and reading those past postings made me sad! :( All that stress from school? Pfft! And look at how my graduation turned out... ANYWAY, here are the "renditions of some important scenes" now posted years later:
if I remember correctly, this is the scene were the snake came down and later bit me.
I know there was a female figure in the bathroom with me and I couldn't tell if it was Lou or my sister. But in anay case, this is when I looked in the mirror and saw the boil in my eye that oozed blue stuff and then I knew - knew I was poisoned that is.
This is when I felt sicker and sicker and knew I was going to die soon. The venom from the snake was turning my insides to mush and when I opened my mouth, I saw the rotting membranes.
This was when I started spitting. I guess I was spitting up my rotting insides. The spit has the consistency of watery, brown, cottage cheese.
Great dream huh? Lord knows how many ugly dreams like that I've had during that time.
When I wake up tomorrow (today), I shall call my school to see if today is the day they have my diploma. I will be more surprised if they HAVE it than if they DON'T have it. I am expecting them not to have it of course. I will also ask if they have my honors certificate. Unless both are ready, I am not going. I want to not have to go to that school until I need a transcript for grad school. And even then I will think about requesting it through email. But then again, they may "lose" it so of course your best bet is to do everything in person. How sad.
Well I guess that is all for now. My webpage should be fatter soon!
:: Jane Dee 12:39:00 AM [+] ::
:: 6.05.2006 ::
Just in case youre hungry, there is a recipie for RAMEN PIZZA.
So graduation has come and gone and now all I have to wait for is my diploma and honors certificate. I guess there is a lot to say...
First of all, graduation was lame. I went the day before to pick up those extra tickets (which I got by the way) and checked out the set up. And as I suspected, there was NO tent/shelter for the graduates, just the "platform party." That was gripe #1. Then I lost my pair of Gucci sunglasses and I thought for sure I was going to go blind the next day from the sun or get drenched from the predicted rain. I was saddened by my loss. I love those glasses because they are nice and dark. I checked everywhere for them and I had a feeling that I left them on the desk in the "i-desk" room. So I left them a message and vowed to annoy them asap the next morning. However, I did order a new pair when I got home, anticipating the worst.
if only my school was always this well kept
Though I didn't even want to go to get the extra tickets, nor did I want to go to the graduation, I made myself get up and hauled ass to CCNY To participate in the 100-something graduation ceremony. After running back and forth to meet up with Rob and surprisingly reunite with my Guccis (yes, the woman at the i-desk didnt steal them!) I made it to the line up for the "school" of social science. This dude in front of me was having a mortarboard malfunction and the button on top of the board fell off thus preventing him from hanging his tassel. After assuring him no one would even notice if he left it off, I helped him secure the tassel on the cap anyway by punching a hole in the board with my trusty palm pilot stylus! He was very proud (and shaking) to have fixed his mortarboard even though he was an economics major and not in the school of engineering. He then proceeded to look at his pack of Marlboros... was he in need of a smoke? Dang! Relax, its just a tassel and its just CCNY. Its not like this is Harvard or something.
So the ceremony started, and to the music accompaniment of the NYPD Bagpipers! (My friend said that they started off playing the 007 theme?! I didnt hear that!) Anyway, the sun came out and it was getting sunny. At least we weren't going to get soaked. I had tucked an umbrella in my purse in case. When the equation involves City College, you know you have to prepare for ALL bad outcomes. I marched on with thh crowd to our seats and I was looking for anyone in my group but I couldnt see anyone so I kept buzzing them on the Nextel. To my "surprise" there was a carnation (yellow on mine) and a bottle of water on everyone's seat. I drank the whole bottle even though it was Aquafina (yuck-o) because the sun was beating down on me pretty bad. I had to keep blowing on my skin. Then I just opened the umbrella because I didnt want to get burned for CCNY. I wasn't paying attention to the speakers much and I finally was able to see my crowd. Since I was sitting by the ledge, Rob and G came by my seat and was keeping me company whilst I cook in my robe.
So while the boring speeches went on, I played Tetris on my Nextel. Then they conferred the degrees. Then Chuck Schumer came on to say the same speech I've heard at KCC three times already. THE SAME SPEECH... sprinkled with his little catch phrase "Go for it!" UGHH!!!! (I swear if he is at the KCC graduation and says the same thing again...) So I up and left because I didn't want to stay till the end of this. Besides, I wanted to get my honors certificate. Why? Well, I received a letter saying it could be picked up after commencement. How do you think that turned out? Of course I didn't get it. What was I thinking? To make matters worse, it turns out that I am a lowly Cum Laude. They finally caught up to whatever mistakes they were making and became consistent (not right, but consistent). Not only that, according to the program, I have a bachelor of science and a bachelor of science in education. WOW! I have two degrees and I didn't even know! Sigh.
NOW do you all understand why I DEMAND to go to private school????
So now, as per my other letter, I can pick up my diploma "on or after" June 6. Frankly, if you don't know when they are to arrive, why are you telling me? If I call on June 6, I bet they won't have them. Well, on the day I get my diploma, I can also get my honors certificate as per the "office engineer" at the office of student affairs who informed me that my honors certificate is not ready. BVVFFTT... I can't even put into the words the frustration...
So all that is left to do now is to pick up my stuff. I was even able to sell my last textbook on Amazon! There shall be no trace of CCNY except logo memorabilia. And no, I will not join their alumni society. I'd rather be in the KCC Alumni Society anyways.
Speaking of which, I have to attend the KCC Graduation on June 12. That is always fun because we get bagels and A TENT to sit under to PROTECT us from the weather. We may also get a gift. Last year I got a mug. If they give us mugs again, I ain't taking it. I have too many mugs as it is. I am trying to get my friends to come with me to take some better pictures than the ones I took with the backdrop of smoggy New Jersey. And in my mind, it can make up for my crappy ceremony. Sorta.
Now for the next couple of weeks, I plan to upload years worth of pictures, including my graduation and Maine last year and this year. I will post the links to some new stuff here as they get done.
Right now, I am off to edit some lightning footage I took out my window. I have some pretty good shots.
:: Jane Dee 9:41:00 PM [+] ::