Welcome! This blog is Retired. However, you may still enjoy some of the finer pages of vintage online ramblings out there! Inspired by the certainty of my headaches, "The Headache Diaries" may include my headache log, people, places, and things that I don't like, as well as people, places, and things that I do like. Blog officially retired 02.14.2021
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First off, my tests went horribly. I think I am going to have to repeat something. Maybe two things. Not everything but at least one thing.
I was struggling with this idea all weekend. I had gone through sadness and happiness, crying and being "okay," to wanting to pack my bags and leaving right this minute. Then, I called my mother. I don't normally call her when I'm not well, but I thought for some reason to call her. We talked for about three hours and she told me that repeating wouldn't be a big deal. She told me about some people, even some who are in Caribbean school, who had trouble and either got through it or is still working on it. I felt a little better after talking to her. I felt that I could stay and try again.
I woke up the next day feeling worse though. I was so down, I felt like I was going to have to go home and seek help. I talked to TJ and he said that I would have to come home if I start to get more moody and feel worse. I agreed, but I really wanted to try again. I figured I just needed time to adjust. I went online to pass the time and saw my old friend AC on my FB and started talking. I guess I was desperate and I started to tell him what was up. I guess it was a good idea, I felt a lot better telling another person! We had a good time making fun of stuff and I was distracted. I was able to go to sleep at least.
This morning, I was accepting of my doom. Not that I was happy about it, but that I could deal with it because I was prepared. We started off with our "histology" class which is basically taught to us through skype. I know right? It wasn't terrible, but we could not establish a connection to have both video and audio. So we quit the class and would start again at 10am. Then came bchem and the review of the test. Bomb. Yeah, that's a class that I may have to repeat. Then we started Histology part II. Not good. No connection again. Sigh. Well, it wasn't a big deal. I will just have to read everything myself.
Then came anatomy. Score. Big deal. Why? Because my school has it out for my professor. They are trying to get rid of him. And that pisses me off because he is a damn good professor. I don't want to write too much about it though. I want to see what happens before I write anything bad. And I will. Eventually.
So now I have to decide if I want to stay another semester. It's not a bad deal given the circumstances. I feel a little more empowered to stay and get my shit together after talking to some people. I just keep holding on to my goals. Maybe that will help.
