:: The Headache Diaries (Retired) ::

:: The Headache Diaries (Retired) ::

:: 11.29.2003 ::

Hey!

Check out my new Curse Generator on the sidebar.

:: Jane Dee 5:15:00 PM [+] ::
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AH HAHAHAHA!

Seems there is an agreement on Geologists (and Engineers too... maybe I ought rearrange my list again huh?)

:: Jane Dee 4:15:00 PM [+] ::
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WHEW!

Omg I just finshed that damn health report! I didn't know I would get so into it that I would take all day. GEEZ!

Hmm. Im confused. Should I start reading my anatomy book or should I start my mother's webpage.... I am not going to do the psy paper yet. Or the stats homework. hmmm...

I think I'll do the webpage. It seems easier. :P

:: Jane Dee 8:58:00 PM [+] ::
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Heyy!

This is a great site! Check it out!

:: Jane Dee 9:56:00 PM [+] ::
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Alzheimer's It Is!

In honor of November being National Alzheimer's Disease Month, I will do my women's health report on Alzheimer's disease. I have some excellent links that I will be using:

4Women.Gov
Alzheimer's and Mental Retardation
AD and menopause
AD for kids (great site, easy reading and informative for all!)
Prevalence study
Female hormones and AD

:: Jane Dee 3:05:00 PM [+] ::
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Checking this out

Hey I got a chance to go to the DMV today!! Well, I'm not really that excited, I'm just kidding. I had to renew my license and apparently, if you make a trip to the office for a renewal, you must take a new picture. Well, for the next eight years, my license will feature my blue hair. I didn't really want to have it that way, but what am I going to do, argue? Well, at keast it didn't take too long. Maybe I can retake the picture at a different time, maybe when my hair is NOT blue.

Well, that didn't work.

I did find out that a girl in my class had found my lab notes and will return then to me on Tuesday. That's good because I was going to bring my computer and scanner to class and scan someone's lab manual for my missing pages. Looks like I won't have to go to such lengths.

So here I sit trying to muster up some initiative to get my papers written. I think I will use online resources to complete my women's health paper. Who cares? Or, I use my own coleection of books... maybe hmm. Well, hopefully I can get that done today as well as the psychology paper. I also have to get started on a webpage for my mother's store. She keeps pestering me. I wish she would have asked to use my digital camera! All I have are regular pictures and now I have to scan all this nonsense. Well that page shouldn't take too long at least. I hope...

Now I have to figure out what sort of women's health issue I want to discuss. Mental Health issues are always my fav. But what would I discuss? Depression is boring. Maybe aromatherapy? HAHAHAHA!!! All I know is that I will NOT be doing breast cancer. Hmm. Maybe I can do it on all the fab jewelry that breast cancer has inspired....?

:: Jane Dee 9:13:00 AM [+] ::
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Cows are cool!

Ohhhh! Where oh where are my notes?? You know, I really can't understand how I lost my lab notes. Anyway, I have an interesting weekend headed my way. Lots of work, and this time, I have to write papers! I'm trying to type up one now that is due tomorrow (today I mean) but I'm so tired and its taking forever. On my to do list for this weeked includes 1) gathering materials for my research paper due in my women's health class and typing it up and making notes for the oral presentation 2) writing about something for psychology, not to mention reading about morals as the next chapter and the extra chapter we have to read for the optional test that would replace a low grade 3) read and make notes for anatomy class 4) do my (overdue) stats homework

Hey at least I sent out for my CPR certification card. I need that to get into the clinical component of my major. I was thinking that I would also get vaccinated for HepB over my break (also required for my major) and buy my scrubs. Im kind of excited about this winter because I won't have to go to school. All I will do is work and make money and fianlly start saving to move. Yay!! It's getting nearer friends! I can see it now... I am so out of here!!

Another thing I thought I may do... A girl in one of my classes was telling me that she took the 6 week course to become a nurse aide and gets paid decent money... I was thinking that maybe I should do that. Maybe I can work less and get paid more and be able to have a job that in in the field. I will look into it soon. Maybe it'll be great.

I was also hoping that when I do my nurse training in the hospitals, I could do it in a hospital that has a psych ward. I was thinking that I would volunteer my time in the ward as a student nurse? I'm not sure they would let me do it , but I will ceratinly give that a whirl.

Ohh lord look at the time! I better finish this paper!

:: Jane Dee 12:50:00 AM [+] ::
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Jim Dandy...

I have a few things to say:

1) A Poem:

Give him an inch - He will want a foot
Tell him it hurts - He will only hurt you more
The only advantages I have are the ones taken from me
These things do not hurt me - They only sting with familiarity

2) (More) Bad News:
My botched lab test is a measly 88. Not cool.

3) Good News (thankfully)
My physiology test was a whooping 108/112! Now I can crack a smile.

4) Same 'Ol:
Didn't I already say I had a knack for these things? That's right, I did.

:: Jane Dee 4:00:00 PM [+] ::
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Hey hey hey

Guess what came in the mail. An invite to join the New York Academy of Sciences. Why they are asking me to join is beyond me. I don't have a doctorate and I certainly don't contribute anything to the field of mathematics, which is my degree. I wonder if I after I fill in the information, they will look and go "Oh man, we made a mistake in asking her!!" and send me back my money. Hmm. I'll think about it. It would be nice to say in a snooty way "Why yes, I am an active member of the New York Academy of Sciences." I guess it doesn't matter too much... Maybe they still had my name for when I was a representative for my High School in the NYAS Science Expo? Maybe they just need the money? Who knows. Maybe they heard about my proposed research on allergies.

In other wonderful news... oh wait, I don't have any wonderful news yet.

Okay, I'll get back to you when I do.

:: Jane Dee 5:42:00 PM [+] ::
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The unthinkable has happened today!

Okay, look, I'm trying to find humour in something that has made me pretty angry today. I actually botched my anatomy test today. The prof asked us to give the volumes of respiration... and I think "Oh he must mean the actual volumes", i.e, 500ml etc. So I go and put down all the numbers... later on, well not much later on, I realize he just wanted us to put down the NAMES of the volumes (tidal volume, etc). That was a whole section wasted. THEN I go and mess up on diabetes insipidus and mellitus! MORE POINTS OFF! I don't think I scored more than an 85, and I am being generous here. He does drop the lowest grade, but what happens if I needed that drop on one of the remaining tests? Then what? My A+ goes down the drain and all my hard work will be for naught.

In better news, that same prof gave us back the first part of our latest physiology test. I did well, scoring a 40/42 on that part. (Okay, I'm smiling a bit here).

Don't think I'm crazy... I failed plenty of times in my life.. I'm just sick of it. I want to do the best I can now and these setbacks make me feel so useless.

I guess every genius has his off day...

:: Jane Dee 5:26:00 PM [+] ::
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Bleh...

And that is all I have to say about that... stupid crap. I would be better off as I was... maybe.

:: Jane Dee 10:51:00 PM [+] ::
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Whew!

Well, I don't know if I just know what I'm doing or if that test was deceivingly easy... Well, lets hope it's because I know what I'm doing. I really thought I was going to do horribly but as far as I know, it wasn't too bad.

Curiosity has lead me to find that I am actually a large framed gal seing that my height is about 5'2" and my wrist circumference is about 6.5" and my elbows width is a bit more than 2.5". I think that is pretty cool. I get to weigh more!

I was asked about what is given to someone who is bitten by a snake, antivenom or antidote, etc. Interestingly enough, we discussed antivenom a couple of days ago and lo and behold, it was on today's physiology exam: "... antivenom is really: Gammaglobulins" I was trying to find the structure of snake venom, but I found this instead.

Anitdotes, I gather, are things (not antibodies) given to someone to neutralize or render harmless stuff that would otherwise be deleterious to the body. Such as seen here. I guess sometimes antidote is used for antivenom. Maybe antidote is a more general term.

Click here for an interesting related topic

Also on my test was a question about Tom Dolittle (?) and how he died when he was hung... I put anoxic anoxia.... maybe it was stagnant anoxia? hmm. I thought choking was anoxic hypoxia but that wasn't a choice. We'll see...

:: Jane Dee 7:39:00 PM [+] ::
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Decisions, Decisions...

A fridge? A watch? A bag? An umbrella?

Yes its true. Im going to get a fridge in my room. This has gone on long enough.

Tomorrow looks like another fun-filled day of filling my finger joints with lactic acid. I have much studying to do and will wake up mighty early in an attempt to finish at least the anatomy part. All I do is write notes and I write so much that the joints in my finger start to burn. Sigh. I hope I can get all the notes done tomorrow because I'm visiting Lou from Lou's Universe tomorrow (well today actually just much later). I hope it will be fun.

Monday should be an interesting day. I am supposed to get back my statistics test... i dont think I got a 100 this time. Hm we'll see. I don't think I got lower than a 94. heheheh.


Okay, its' time for "bed". Later!

:: Jane Dee 11:02:00 PM [+] ::
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Some thought....

I am at a loss for words these days only because I'm scared the truth may come out.

That would be funny if I had a sense of humour right now. But I don't.

In fact, I think I'm pretty agitated. I think I'm angry. No. I AM angry. I am very angry.

All of this anger is making me want to put it somewhere... where.... Perhaps I shall change the theme of Planet Bizarro and make it reflect exactly what I am experiencing. We'll see.

Now I shall try to study...

:: Jane Dee 7:27:00 PM [+] ::
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Another day to complain

I went to study at the library (again) today. It was nice to have the sun shining on me even though I wasn't too excited to study anatomy. I was kind of blah actually. I was sitting there listening to my familiar collection of tunes that can make me feel more or less blah. I did notice that I was fowarding to all the more blah inducing tracks... you know, slow, kind of sad, melencholic if you must... and I sat there gazing out the window as the music played. It felt reminiscent of the spring semester when I would go to the library everyday (yes, everyday) and study as hard as I could to try to rid my self of all the pain I felt from all that had happened to me. I know I usually don't blog about this personal stuff, but I felt it nessecary today.

I know I have come a long way since a year ago... October 2002 will always be the time I will remember as "The Time of Collapse", which happens to be the last phase of a strange series of events that took place in my life. The new life started when I got the job at the Kosher Mart. That is when I finally started to reconstruct. Today I realized just how far I have come since last October, and I can say that had to be the most painful time in my whole life. Even more painful than my breakup. That was the time I had lost everything and felt its existence. That was when I realized just how alone and abandoned I really was and realized just how wrong everything was.

I gave myself another chance even though I felt as worthless as shit. I know my self-esteem had been lower at some previous point in time, but this came close. Completely changing my major and going back to a school I was to have supposed to have left didn't make the matter any better. Only until I realized how well I was doing in Microbiology (not to mention that I took a heavy load (15 credits) to prove I wasn't stupid and worked at the kosher mart to crazy hours of the night) along with everything else did I start to feel better. I was grateful that I such a great professor.

Only until the summer when I started to take anotomy did I realize I could get my life back. When I did so well in that class (not to mention learned how to really swim) did I get this surge of confidence. I suddenly felt the blood flowing.

This semester seems to be the culmination of yet another phase which has proved to be very beneficial to me. This is because I actually started to get into psychology and that class (!!) opened a pandoras box of issues. This semester has been so difficult only because I had to "relive" the pain of childhood memories that I wished to keep repressed. However, my brain does what it wants and decided to let me view an assortment of flashbacks which would haunt me up to ten times a day. I was able to overcome them by truely believing that they happened and that I knew who I am and I knew who they were and I wasn't fooling anyone by denying anything anymore. Waves of life came over me and I feel more and more powerful each day. I don't have the same attitude I once did.

I don't know what is in store for me next. I'm hoping this is the end of this phase and that next year holds great promise... promise that I can have faith in.

Now I have homework to do.

:: Jane Dee 2:06:00 PM [+] ::
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I just have this knack I guess.

It's either my profound fear of emitting foul body odor is true or I just know how to pick them. Maybe it's a mixture of both. Maybe I just need new deodorant? Maybe I should just listen to myself next time and forget the whole thing all together.

Yeah that's the answer.

:: Jane Dee 8:33:00 PM [+] ::
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