:: The Headache Diaries ::

:: The Headache Diaries ::


Welcome! Enjoy some of the finer pages of online ramblings out there! If you have found this page through BlogSpot, please visit my homepage using the links on the sidebar. Inspired by the certainty of my headaches, "The Headache Diaries" may include my headache log. I also like to log other things such as people, places, and things that I don't like, as well as people, places, and things that I do like.

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:: 7.28.2005 ::

Worried (no, for really real)

So today (later today) is the last day of summer school and I have to submit my final paper. All 23 pages of it. I am worried because there is a chance I can get a B+....

Look, I know that is a good grade, but after getting all those A's, a B is like, a bad grade. It's sad I know. I'm whack.

Anyway, the reason I think I can get a B+ is because my instructor kept giving me 8.5/10 on my smaller papers, so I am worried that even though I painstakingly corrected my paper a million times using ALL her suggestions (and will kindly point that out on an attached post-it note on my paper), she will wind up giving me an 8.5 on my paper thus giving me a B+. I didn't have time to do another extra credit. Sigh. I just hope my paper say "A"!!!!

So right now I am just staring into space because I'm too nervous to go to sleep because I have to go to school tomorrow and drop it in her mailbox and keep checking my grades over and over until I can't take it no more. Actually, if I DO get a B+, I will have to go back to her and show her how I corrected my paper accordingly and all those corrections should at least give me a 9/10 since uncorrected was an 8.5/10.

UGH! Stop it!...ok... calm down...

Anyway, I need to go back to the advisors to find out if I have to take that freshman class. I signed up for it just in case, so if I don't need it, all I have to do is drop it. THEN I get to go to the Psi Chi guy and have him sign me up. HA! THEN I can order my ring and get ready for my grand finale. WHoo HOOOoo!!

OOOH! Im getting rid of my car by next week to make room for my NEWer car. I'm geting one next week or so if the pickings are good. I won't register it until later though so I can pay for my books first and all that crap. Then, by November, I should have it ready to go! Wheeee!

Ok I am totally going nuts. Ok, ok ok ok ok ok....ARGH!

Im going to brush my teeth now.

:: Jane Dee 12:09:00 AM [+] ::
...
:: 7.18.2005 ::
My First Thesis

I spent all day and night fixing my methods section and now I can make up the results! I am actually going to make up all the results and push it through SPSS to see what happens.

After much confusion, I figured out the design. I am doing a 2x2x3 mixed factorial design on depression, cognition and pain. Whoo hoo!

I was going to be in a sleep study tomorrow, but I need tomorrow to do my paper. I think I will go to KCC. Free A/C and better computers. Well, I rescheduled that appointment for next week.

Right now it is 3pm. I should get some coffee and work on my "results" then when I go home tonight, I can push them through SPSS. I am so curious as to how the results will look. Then I will finish the results and discussion tomorrow. That should be good. Then I can spend the rest of the week formatting it to APA style. Then I will have plenty of time to study for the final and get another A. Heh heh.

My how far I've come.

Summer school ends next week and I couldn't be happier. That means I get to start on MY LAST SEMESTER soon and FINALLY get my B.S.!!! I also finally heard from the Psi Chi and it turns out that I have to wait until the end of August. Well, I'll be waiting. Then I can FINALLY order my ring (I am getting it with a special symbol I want to symbolize Psi Chi, so I don't want to order it before I'm in it!). I am also going to finish up buying what I need for the year (like contacts) and start to save for my new(er) car. I need to get something decent looking with a few (more) years left and that can take me across the country. The cool thing is that when I donate my car, I get a free hotel stay. I was thinking of using that, along with my FedEx plane discount, to visit a school I'd like to go to. If I have a lot of time off, I may be able to drive to some. But one thing at a time I guess.

Well, I better get going. I need to make up some scores and leave a little earlier so I can stop by and get a spray bottle and possibly a sweat band. Today is so hot and humid I will expect the worst at work. Yuck!

:: Jane Dee 11:51:00 AM [+] ::
...
:: 7.11.2005 ::
Now I Have To Do Some Calculations

Since I have a little bit of time now, I am going to do some calculatin'.

I need to create some agenda b.s. so I can manage, etc. hmmm.

:: Jane Dee 1:13:00 PM [+] ::
...
Forget that!

I had a bunch of paragraphs written about my experimental class and >poof< explorer on this Mac closed. Humph!

Anyway, I am not writing that over. It was about my good grades anyway. I think you all know about that by now.

I was just excited that this semester is almost over and then I will have just one more semester to go and I FINALLY get my B.S.. If all goes well, I will have a greta GPA and a few honor societies to boot.

The more pressing issue is this whole mortgage thing. It looks like my mother agreed to my suggestions and is going to talk to the bank about the loan to buy that person out. If that happens, we will have to rent the basement and or the garage to secure the mortgage payments. However, that basement needs a little fixing. I'm worried that I will be overwhelmed because I still have classes to take and a car to pay for and I don't make that much at work. I originally wanted to get another job, but I am not sure I will be able to do that if I am trying to study Organic Chemistry and or Biochemistry (which btw, is not offered at community colleges, i'd actually have to go to Brooklyn or Queens college or back to City to take that if I decided to take it here meaning NYC). The more I do here, the easier it will be for me later. At least I think that is the case...

:: Jane Dee 12:19:00 PM [+] ::
...
:: 7.10.2005 ::
Whoa. My Love.

HA! I am done with my methods. Now let's see if they hold up. I also wonder if I can push them through SPSS. PPFFFTTT! We'll see. My prof said to look for confounds. Uhm er, yes?

Right now, I am listening to Blue Dress by DM. I recall sitting with Lou at SB drawing a poster of someone (wink wink) and drinking just a wee too much Midori. (DON'T comment on that!!! SHHHHHH!!) Anyway, I've been having a huge flood of memories coming back to me lately. Most fun, some not so fun, but all having some kind of "after school special" quality to then that I "learned" something from them all.

What's worse: Mad cow disease or Ebola Zaire?

:: Jane Dee 11:38:00 PM [+] ::
...
Up For Nothin'

Well here I am awake for no reason, listening to music and blogging when I'm supposed to be finishing my methods section for my experimental class. I'm doing a continuation of a few studies done on pain and cognitive function. I want to get cognitive scores from people who are chronic pain patients or have migraines who score similarly on pain scales and emotional health. This would close some gaps in the studies I have read. In one group, the patients had similar pain scores but differing depression scores and in another the emotions were assesed but it wasn't clear what the pain levels were.

Yeah anyway!

I have lots to do, but no time to do it. Sigh.

:: Jane Dee 9:56:00 PM [+] ::
...
:: 7.09.2005 ::
Deep Tuna

That is so awesome!!

:: Jane Dee 10:59:00 PM [+] ::
...
:: 7.07.2005 ::
what the hell?

London too?

Sigh.

:: Jane Dee 12:32:00 PM [+] ::
...
A Squared

Guess what I got. Another A! Psi Chi here I come!

Anyway, I got an A in my cognition class. I must have blown her away with my final paper. I actually WORKED on that one. I actually sat there and did more than one draft. I did about five! I went over it again and again. Wow! I must have got an A on that. I will have to check next semester. SHAZAAAAAAMMMM!!!

In other good news, I FINALLY became a real employee at FedEx. Yes, after all this waiting and complaining, I signed my papers to be a permanent shuttle driver for FedEx. So now, they are allowed to fire me with abandon. Hoo-Ray. Well, the good side is that I get benefits finally whivh means they have to pay my tuition etc. Hee-Haw! Anyway, the only problem I have now is with these mysterious "lates" I have. Seems I punched in the wrong things and that counts against me. Not that I'm extremely worried, but I don't want to get get into trouble for not being there when i was there the whole time. Well, We'll see.

My job is basically driving a truck to JFK and unloading the whole damn thing. Yes, it's heavy, yes it's very hard and yes I like it very much. I get completely drenched in sweat every night. It's disgusting, but it's cool. My truck is the heaviest after the airport shuttles. This guy from DPK (a station in Hicksville) thinks he is sooooo kewl and tough. Once he grabbed the cart right out of my hand. Well, I don't know about you but that is totally rude. Then he tries to be my friend and introduces himself and shakes my hand. I'm like "hmm." He deliberately comes earlier to get the first spot to unload his stuff. He makes it seem like I'm slow to unload but he doesn't realize that my truck is twice as full. DUH DUMBASS. Then there is this other guy who keeps wanting to go out with me and I'm like "Uhm, I have school" but he doesn't seem to get the message. I need to learn to be meaner, but I just don't want enemies at work. I should try to uglify myself. That should work.

Summer school is just about half done. My class ends July 28 or so. I am so excited. Currently I am getting an A in my experimental class. It's great to be getting such good grades. WHOO HOO! A! A! A! (and A and A and A... come to think of it, the last non-A I got was for drawing... hm.)

New Decisions
So let's get serious for a minute here. Because my life is not the typical life, I have some interesting descions to make. First is taking over the mortgage of my house. My mother finally closed her store and she is basically retiring. Now I could move out and have to pay a lot of bills, or stay at home and help her pay the mortgage after she clears out some unwanted person who lives there. We could then rent the basement like we used to and that woul dbe a big help. Either that or we sell or outlive someone. Personally, I'd rather buy that person out. It's best if that person just goes away and leaves us alone.

So that means that I wont be getting that Mustang I wanted. It's back to the Escort range. Sigh. I hope that I can at least find a Focus this time. I'm finally getting rid of my car. I just want that letter from the dealer that the lien doesnt exist so I can donate the car and give them the title. Bye bye piece of crap. However, I'm keeping the battery. Its brand new.

So the new plan is basically this (if the buy out option works): We wait to buy the person out until January so I can a)finish school and pay off the books and ring and graduation fees b)save up enough to buy a new(er) car so I can have some working wheels. Then if the buy out goes through, we have to move people around in my house and fix the basement. My sister said she wants to move so we'll see. If she does, we can rent the basement. I then can pay some amount for the mortage and I can continue to live here instead of moving because the only reason I wanted to move was to get away from the unwanted person we are trying to buy out. Then when it is time for me to go away for school, the basement can be rented, the garage can be rented and my mother can live there and not have to pay too much until I return. Because if I go away to school, I am not sure how much I can contribute to her if I need to live on my own. Now all I need is some Jesus on my side and we will be allright.

Right now I am buying everything I need for the next couple of years like shoes and clothes because I am going to have to calculate every penny once I start saving for that car and graduation. I have faith this will work.

Okay! it's time for class. Yay me!

:: Jane Dee 9:08:00 AM [+] ::
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